Out of the country

I am having such a wonderful time in Eastern Europe that I don't want to leave. There is so much to see and enjoy that it feels like I'm not going to have much time getting to do and see all that I want in just two weeks.
I am planning on writing some more however I'm still recovering from jet lag! I do however have some pictures of the Nederland that I want to share!! Enjoy and until next time!

Just when you think you are in Hell..

You find there are more layers to it.
I am starting to think that Dante had it right. There really are nine depths of hell, not including the gate of hell and the dark wood. I have dreams just like everyone else, some a little more out there then they should. However, since I was at the tender age of nine I have only had one dream and that was to leave this simple po'dunk town and never look back.
I have actually been successful a couple of times, however this last attempt was not something I like to think about.
I managed to live out of this town of almost ten years and I have to say those had been the BEST nine years of my entire life. I actually felt as though I could give this hell forsaken state, California, the approval it has been so desperately trying to get from me since I was dragged here by hair from the sweet state of Texas.
Then out of the blue, due to an unforeseeable accident things came crashing down upon me. I am not happy that we are here in this hell hole I like to refer to as the ninth layer of hell. The place were no one cares about the needs of their handicap brother or sisters unless it happens to coincide with a need of there own. A town that is just like high school and never grows up, just keeps on with  juvenile gossip and cares.
I am also going to another country in a couple of days, this is another dream of mine. However, this whole trip is overshadowed by the fact that I will have to return to this place.
As I have said before and I will say until I no longer have to step foot back here, I would rather be tied to a post then burned  alive then EVER return.
I almost don't feel as though I wanna go. I would rather continue my search for a job in Washington, and move. I'd rather spend two weeks in hotel in the chosen state while pounding the pavement in order to secure the need of getting out of this place.
I am afraid that when we return I will be stuck here. I feel myself loose the simple spring in my step and the ever smile on my face. I do anything and almost everything I can to get out of this house. I schedule myself to be out of town as much as possible. I really wish there was something that I could do.
On my birthday a few days ago I cried my eyes out. I NEVER wanted to spend another birthday here. Most of my birthdays have  been horrible, starting from them never taking place or that they were just down right miserable. I felt as though the world was going to crash around me, and all of me wanted it to.
There has not a day since I was told that we were going to say here for a while that I don't think about what life would be like if I just bow out.
I am suddenly short tempered and constantly putting down whatever I possible can when I can. I even went as far as going to a movie out of town just so I could get out for a while. The more I do though the more heavy I feel, and the more I want to just stay in bed until I do actually fade away.
I don't understand what we did to end up in a place that has always made me miserable and no my husband. I was working on my bachelor's degree and my husband was at the top of his game. We had been so happy, about to buy a house and now we are reduced to nothing. All because of a man who decided not to wait his turn at a stop light and never stopped to see if my husband was alright. So now what?
How do I fix this? How do I keep my promise to myself and get out of here by the end of January? I have prayed almost ever second that passes that Washington isn't one of the other 48 states that hates California and someone gives me a chance. I am so desperate I am going to be applying at McDonald's and whatever else will take my app online. Until then I hope this hanging cloud over my head leaves the same day I do!

And the kid is heading to Germany

For as long as I can even remember I have always wanted to head over the ocean and venture the lands of Europe and the UK. I had even applied for an American College in France after I finished high school but alas was unable to go because I had not a real birth certificate. (Long story) Then I had told myself I that I would go after I had gotten myself into the career of my choice. Well, after some bumps in the road and some issues with life I was unable to get into the career of my choice.

Now only because of a fortuitous situation, as a result of a horrendous year, we are finally heading to Europe. We will be going to Germany and to France and who knows where else. My sweet husband is trying to arrange the trip so we can make a stop in the good old UK, which is all because he knows I have ALWAYS wanted to go there. 

 

So this Christmas will be jam packed with pictures, mainly selfies and landscape. I will also be annoying and take pictures of what I am eating. When I hop over to France I will take pictures of all the cheese I am not suppose to have!!

I am so excited!!

Until then!!

10th Anniversary

For my 10th Wedding Anniversary I have to say I am at a loss for what to get my husband. I have tried so very hard to get him a pre-order of the PlayStation, however the Amazon Gods and other fine retail establishments have decided that they are no longer taking pre-orders. Mind you I have been trying to get a pre-order for like months.
So back to square one, and hoping like all get out that the day of I will manage to purchase one at the store..ugh!!
Alas this is a milestone and I want to celebrate as though it is something special. I do not want this day to be "just another day" as all of my other anniversaries have been. I want to go somewhere and see something. I want to eat something we both normally do not have on a daily bases. For the love of all that is holy I DO NOT WANT MEXICAN!!! I want something like Greek or French food. I want something with a flare of exotic. I want to go somewhere it is cold and some place where we can bring our son, cause we both love having him around and things can still be memorable with the love of our lives.
So planning must commence! I thought about getting my one and only all three seasons of "Game of Thrones." In addition to the PlayStation...oh I use the PlayStation as well for movies and working out it is not just a him item.
The only thing I want is for one day to remember why we are so into each other and to make this day special and unlike any other!
Now Supernatural is coming on I have to go!! Until next time!!

Oh Halloween

Oh how I love Halloween!! I love the lore, the costumes, oh and the treats. Every year I try so very hard to make my decorations old Victorian but never seem to find anything. Then I tried colonial, and most of that I was able to get from Martha Stewart. However, I still stand firm that woman has way too much time on her hands. I mean half the stuff she recommends is just super time consuming.  Yet, I love it. 

I know I must hate myself.
This year I am not decorating, since I am not in the mood to decorate I am going to be baking harder then Miss Betty herself. I have downloaded my recipes, I have cut out my stencils for the air brush effects I might attempt. This is gonna be so fun.
I am excited to watch "Shaun of the Dead" AGAIN!! I am eager for more "Supernatural" and my new favorite, though it has been my favorite story since I was small,  "Sleepy Hallow."
Aside from the football, veggie chill and the cool weather this is why I LOVE fall. I love love fall and winter. I could do without summer!
I am keeping this short but I plan on posting more soon. Until then...keep watching all those Nerdy shows. I think the "Big Bang Theory" is on and I am gonna watch it.

Why Seth Rogen...Why?

This is probably going to be short. I have a selected group of actors that I would run to the theater and watch. Seth Rogen, James Franco, Jonah Hill and of course my duo from England Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are just the comedians I adore. So of course when I have a moment of free time I'm going to watch one of their new moves. In comes the movie "This is the End." I loved the humor of this film, even all the way till James Franco gets saved and tells those around him to do something to his man part. (use your imagination here.)

I was sad at this point but when it got to another point in the movie where they had ended up in Heaven I was down right  WTF mode. 

I would thought Seth would would have wished for James Franco back, and I would have excepted Jay to have wished James back for his friend Seth. After all the film is all about friendship. However, that didn't happen. So that leaves me to ask Why Seth? I thought James was your homie? :) Which leads me into my second question....Will there be a "Pineapple Express 2"? Cause that would be awesome. So to answer your movie question, Yes you should make sequels to all of your films...well most of them..

Oh and by the way what the heck did Emma Watson do to not get saved! Too funny!! 

The Lecture

Recently I have been thrust into a situation that is less than desirable. I am living in a place that I do not like. I would rather be burned at the stake then live here another day. However, this is the situation that I am, and it is something that has happened to me due to circumstances beyond my control.
I have a friend, lets call her Amy, who used to be a close friend. A best friend if you will, but alas after high school she and I did what normal people do after a while. We grew apart. She stayed in the town I hate and I moved to a different town.
Temporarily I have moved back to this town, and she and I have started our friendship up again as though nothing has changed. I still no longer use her as someone to confide in, I tell her the summary of things going on in my life but nothing that is secretive. However, this doesn't stop her from judging me and lecturing me on things she knows nothing about.
She wasn't shy about explaining to me how much of a loser I am and how I have allowed this situation to happen. Mind you I didn't plan on a member of my family becoming disable. I was working on my bachelor degree, I wasn't working when all this occurred. When things came crashing down I tried very hard to get another job, so I could stay where I wanted to stay. However, that didn't happen. I am finding it much harder to get a job since I have been out of work for so long even though I have been keeping up with my skills. I have gone through agencies telling me I have no skills, though the ones they expected me to have were none I have ever used in a professional setting. I have been through countless interviews where they look at me with sadness and tell me that I would be perfect if I was bilingual. The hill I am working up isn't easy but I'm trying. Having a "friend" tell me that I am not doing everything I need to do and I should be ashamed for applying for jobs in a place I don't want to be. By the way she wants me to apply for jobs here, but I am not....I mean why would I want to be in a place I don't want to be. My husband and I have figured out where we want to be and how we are going to get there. I just do not understand why she feels the need to comment on things she doesn't understand. When asked were I was planing on living she snorted at my answer. Why? Well, I assume it was not the place she had hoped. She then asked me what was in this town we wanted to move to. My first answer wanted to come out as "NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS" however, I didn't say that I informed her that my husband had uncles near by. She pursed her lips in frustration. I have been mean to other friends before when they were doing things that continued a behavior that hurt them. However, I NEVER stopped being supportive to someone when they needed it. I am wondering why in the world she felt the need to belittle me and then to proceed belittling me behind my back to other friends. Amy finds my husband to be a loser, I don't understand how he can be though of as a loser. Things occurred to him, by no fault of his own. He didn't ask to be hurt at work, nor did he put himself in harms way.
I wish she would take a moment and think that with all the layoffs she could have been cut from her job as a teacher, and her husband could easily become disable as well being a cop. So question..why isn't she more of a friend.
A true friend would say..."Hey there is a position at work you can do until you find something better. I can talk to my boss..." not lecture you about things beyond your control.